You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
