she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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