Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
