One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize