Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
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