He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
