I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
