He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
