It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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