A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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