What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
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