why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize