Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
People with herpes should wear stickers.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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