i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
