This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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