ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
