yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Randomize
