fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Randomize