This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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