you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Randomize
