So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
from now on my penis is your penis
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
