I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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