I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize