Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
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me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
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It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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