I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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