Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
