Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(604): View more from British Columbia

I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.

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(604): I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry. http://tfl.nu/rlh2

Replies (16) Good night (1193) Bad night (4847)
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(310): View more from California

Even water is tasting like jack daniels

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(310): Even water is tasting like jack daniels http://tfl.nu/2l5a

Replies (15) Good night (4980) Bad night (1362)
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(703): View more from Virginia

It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...

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(703): It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement... http://tfl.nu/l7x1

Replies (8) Good night (2094) Bad night (1822)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

you tipped EVERY employee at white castle

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(732): you tipped EVERY employee at white castle http://tfl.nu/d5zv

Replies (15) Good night (6453) Bad night (1079)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.

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(918): I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out. http://tfl.nu/s7ox

Replies (6) Good night (1374) Bad night (2991)
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(937): View more from Ohio

Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?

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(937): Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes? http://tfl.nu/r1tf

Replies (14) Good night (5152) Bad night (994)
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(731): View more from Tennessee

Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.

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(731): Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work. http://tfl.nu/qr42

Replies (6) Good night (2578) Bad night (1050)
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(+61): View more from Australia

I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.

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(+61): I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane. http://tfl.nu/dlou

Replies (21) Good night (3961) Bad night (697)
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(419): View more from Ohio

I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.

(574): View more from Indiana

Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.

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(419): I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama. (574): Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts. http://tfl.nu/mgxx

Replies (1) Good night (1507) Bad night (466)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.

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(701): You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole. http://tfl.nu/p45w

Replies (6) Good night (805) Bad night (697)
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(321): View more from Florida Space Coast

He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet

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(321): He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet http://tfl.nu/nzlh

Replies (3) Good night (850) Bad night (646)
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(519): View more from Ontario

I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on

(226): View more from Ontario

Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see

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(519): I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on (226): Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see http://tfl.nu/q9aq

Replies (1) Good night (828) Bad night (416)
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(903): View more from Texas

he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.

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(903): he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka. http://tfl.nu/ebtf

Replies (2) Good night (640) Bad night (343)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just saw a government minister puke and rally.

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(+44): Just saw a government minister puke and rally. http://tfl.nu/t9mk

Replies (0) Good night (558) Bad night (218)
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(703): View more from Virginia

All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude

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(703): All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude http://tfl.nu/c2d9

Replies (4) Good night (910) Bad night (272)

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