end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
