i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
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