She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
