She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
