I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
This house was built for laser tag.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
