Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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