well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
