Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize