bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize