I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Success! We fucked roommates!
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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