Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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