talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
