remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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