sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
