More tranny stories later!
omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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