If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
