Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
