i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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