I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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