the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
did you just send me my own nude
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
where are my pants?
in the oven.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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