That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
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