Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
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