If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
He felt like a one man threesome
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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